people always say you don’t know what you have til it’s gone. i try very hard not to take anything or anyone in my life for granted… but even at that, it’s sometimes hard for me to realize just how much a person means to me until there’s a chance that i may lose that person.
the past couple weeks have been crazy… i left my job as a live-in nanny, which means i also became homeless. i’ve had support from lovely friends and my amazing man… but even with the many couches i’ve been offered to crash on, it has not been the easiest situation to get used to. feeling like i was mooching off of people i care about. not knowing where i was going to be in the next couple months… or even where i would stay each night. not knowing how i was going to be able to afford a place to live, let alone how i was going to pay for lunch. simply put, all of that uncertainty was just scary.
it took me by surprise when i realized that what scared me the most was the idea of losing him. i’ve grown so comfortable in our silly, yet enlightening and passionate connection. i feel safe with him… not in the insecure, self-degrading way, but more in the way that i know i can count on him to be honest with me, loving to me, and happy to be with me. all key components of my first healthy, adult relationship.
on wednesday, i’m heading back to virginia for a few weeks… but i am determined to work hard and save up so i can get back here to get ready for my new job and get back to my man. i am so in love with him, and i am so thankful to have him in my life.
